Katie was home from her European tour and we sat down to watch her lovely slide show of all the beautiful places she had visited. She and her friend had simply absorbed the culture wherever they were for almost a month. She had thoughtfully brought gifts for each of us, and mine was a St. Teresa of Avila medal with a prayer card. Written in Spanish, which I don't speak, the contents were somewhat of a mystery for the moment.
Having finished the slide show, I took the dog for a long walk around the neighborhood, where I proceeded to have a mini go-to-pieces (as my mother+ used to call it). Overwhelmed and melancholy, little tears were dripping as I walked, though I wasn't even sure why, so I started a rosary.
As I walked and prayed, I wondered what good it was doing. Yes, I know I'm supposed to meditate on the mysteries, but sometimes that doesn't happen as it ought! I knew in my head that all the same tensions would be present when I got home: unpacking, repacking Meg for summer camp, house cleaning and decluttering, getting ready for school, AHG, feeding my family...Yet I doggedly persisted in my prayer, reaching the last glorious mystery, The Coronation of the Blessed Virgin Mary as Queen of Heaven, as I came up the hill toward home.
All through the walk there had been this niggling little urge to find the translation of the St. Teresa prayer card, and as I started that last decade, I knew in my heart that it held the answer I needed. If you know what it's like to be a mom, you know that for a myriad of reasons, I wasn't able to look it up until this morning! This is what I found, and yes, it is the answer to my problems:
May nothing disturb you!
(St. Teresa of Avila had these verses written in herbreviary**)
May nothing disturb you.
May nothing astonish you.
God does not go away.
can attain anything.
He who has God within,
does not lack anything.
God is everything!*
(Translation by Jorge W. Suazo)
(*This last verse may be interpreted as "God is enough.")
I'm still a little overwhelmed and melancholy, and I still have lots of work to do, but I know it will be okay.